NEED WORK? CONTACT US.

LOOKING TO WRITE? HAVE SOME ART? WE WILL PUBLISH ANYTHING THAT IS NOT PORNOGRAPHIC OR RACIST.

YOU WILL NOT BE ASKED TO SIGN ANY CONTRACTS, YOU WILL RETAIN YOUR FREE WILL. ONLY OUR STAFF UNDERGO SUCH CONTRACTS. 

JOBS:

WE NEED AN EDITOR: MOST OF US CANNOT SPELL OR PUNCTUATE CORRECTLY. THERE ARE A HANDFUL OF ALCOHOLICS, ONE GUY WHO DOES A SHIT TON OF AMPHETAMINES AND THEN THERE IS THE RESEARCH CHEMICAL ABUSE. WE JUST NEED OUR ERRORS IN CURRENT AND PAST EDITIONS CORRECTED.

WE NEED WRITERS: I DON'T CARE HOW GOOD YOU ARE AT WRITING OR HOW FUNNY YOU ARE, WE WILL HELP SHAPE YOU INTO THE PSYCHOTIC WORDSMITH YOU NEED TO BE. WE WILL NEVER LEAVE YOU OUT TO DRY.

WE NEED ARTISTS: OF ALL KINDS: SURELY, I CAN DO SOMETHING WITH YOUR ART. SURLY, YOU CAN DRAW SOMETHING BASED OFF OUR VISIONS.

WE NEED PHOTOGRAPHERS: I WOULD HAVE INCLUDED THIS UNDER ARTISTS BUT PEOPLE GET MAD WHEN YOU DO THAT.

WE NEED MUSICIANS: WE ARE WORKING ON EXPANDING INTO THE WORLD OF MUSIC, AS MANY OF YOU KNOW, 1500hz IS AN ACCOMPLISHED MUSICIAN WITH MULTIPLE RECORDS THAT HAVE SOLD TENS OF CASSETTES. WE WANT TO MATERIALIZE ODDJOB RECORDS.

WE NEED PEOPLE WITH EXTREME PSYCHOLOGICAL OR PERSONALITY DISORDERS: JUST TO HANG AROUND THE OFFICE AND PLAY RAINBOW ROAD ON SUPER MARIO KART ON SUPER NINTENDO WITH. 

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APPLICATION